Ranting About Miserable Gits

As we all know Facebook is a fantasy land of comments and opinions that exists outside of the the normal realms of logical everyday mundane life. What you write on there doesn’t even really count does it. But it does, really. And I’ve quietly been noticing more and more sly shit going down on social media and I have to say, Facebook is ripe with it. Everywhere I look there is some miserable git who seems to think their sole purpose in life is to bring other people down on Facebook. Well I’m here to tell you, it’s not.

Differences of Opinion

There’s a saying that goes ‘opinions are like arseholes, everyone’s got one.’ We don’t all agree, that’s part of the beauty of life. Facebook is a public forum and the differences of opinion and culture and personality make it an interesting online space. I feel if you put something out into the public online space you should be prepared for people to have an opposing opinion. But it seems to be declining at a rapid pace into argument central. I see people (most times women) writing shitty comments even on the most innocent/banal posts. ‘That cat isn’t even cute’. And my point is, we all know you’ve got an arsehole but we don’t always want to see it. Stop flashing your arsehole about like some entitled, insensitive idiot. Because sometimes, your opinion just isn’t needed. Part of maturity is realising that your opinion isn’t always necessary or even, dare I say it, important.

Outspoken

Maybe you’re reading this thinking that being outspoken is a quality you’ve always liked about yourself and I would agree with you there. I have been in situations where my thoughts and feelings have been bursting out of my face. My cheeks go hot and my stomach churns and I feel like Homer Simpson ‘don’t say it Kate, just don’t’ But I have to. Historically this has been where I have observed a considered injustice, and I’m sure you have been in this situation before and can understand just what I am describing. Sometimes, morally I feel like my input is needed. And yes that sounds conceited but I wish everyone felt like that on certain topics like sexism and other blatant isms that need to be regularly challenged if we are ever to hope for a more healthy future for our kids. It’s all the sly underhand comments I personally cannot stand.

Power in the Written Word

I have read so many loaded comments on Facebook. Not so easy to spot sometimes in conversation, in the written word it is plain to see. I posted in a group recently and received a lot these types of loaded comments. My daughter’s school had an opening ceremony that parent’s were not allowed to attend and my post was about how I was disappointed. That’s the general gist of it. The replies were all from other women, who do not know me personally and they were very opinionated, and I thought quite aggressive in places. But not in an overtly obvious way. In that shitty sly way that some women have really perfected. I stopped replying about 2 hours after posting and just watched the post with interest. By the end of the day I had been told I was controlling and unable to let go of my children enough for them to be upstanding members of society. It was suggested I should be more grateful and I should volunteer at the school so I could see with my own eyes how much effort the teachers put in. Instructions to me from people who have no idea of what my personal circumstances are. Most of the replies were patronising and admonished me for what they considered was a trivial opinion. Much of the comments referred back to their own personal circumstances and how things worked for them and that across the board it should be acceptable because it is for them. The old ‘it never harmed me’ argument. On a post that was not at all argumentative by any measure. Or so I initially thought. I was obviously quite wrong. On many levels according to these women.

Social Constructs

It really piqued my interest though because I was fascinated with why they felt so compelled to kind of attack me on this very mundane point. I was interested to consider why I posted it in the first place too. I still don’t fully have the answers to this but I do think some of the replies were defensive. Attacking others’ opinions or way of life often comes from a place of feeling attacked yourself. Why did these women feel so strongly about a school rule? It wasn’t their school and even it were why would they feel so defensive about something so banal? I think it’s because they felt like in a way, my post was saying ‘I don’t think the way you do school is right’ and they wanted to defend their decisions and their way of life. Breastfeeding arguments pop up on my feeds all the time, I stay well away from them because I know how emotive they can get and I do not feel they ever really help in any way with providing useful info about breastfeeding. I would say go to a support group, vent to your friends, but you won’t get far on a Facebook thread when it comes to breastfeeding even if you just wanted a bit of support.

Bitches be Bitchin’

The thing is, half of that stuff would never had been said to my face. In real life if I had said in a group situation what I wrote, I think it would have been the people with supportive things to say who would have made themselves most known and the thinly veiled snarkiness would have gotten side glares. I have to remind myself that among the people who feel it is their right and duty to tear apart anything they see on Facebook – from moaning about family photos to how many Christmas presents your kids got compared to theirs – there are the ones who don’t tear you down. There are people who read your post, didn’t agree with it and scrolled on past. I generally keep my posts as light as possible but people will find fault in anything. I posted to ask if anyone wanted to come to the theatre to watch Titanic the musical and someone commented how terrible it is that there are musicals made about tragedies.

Give it to me straight

What do you think? Do you enjoy a little Facebook war? Do you feel justified when you feel you have out-pointed someone on a Facebook thread? Or have you also noticed how quickly things are taking a nose dive on Facebook? I’m at the point where I’m a bit frightened to post anything on there. Where do you stand?

My Blog Stats – My First Year

 

What kind of numbers could you be looking at after your first year? Which social media channels should you focus on?

May 2017 heralds the completion of one full year of blogging for me. I started when my second baby was 3 months old and I started the blog to share my traumatic birth experience. I had no previous or relevant experience and started from scratch the way many people start- by Googling ‘How to Start a Blog.’

I love my blog. I love sitting down to write, I love finding inspiration for posts in my everyday, I love connecting with people in the blog community, promoting on social media, everything that goes along with it I really enjoy. It’s my creative space. Just mine.  However, I have avoided the anticipated pressure of turning my blog into a business.

The Hippy Christian Mum went self hosted at the end of last year (Dec 2016) in a bid to make it a bit more of an official capacity but I am still relishing the joy it brings of being a hobby rather than a business. I have been messing about over on YouTube too and really enjoying watching other vlogging families and making videos.

So here’s a quick low down of what my stats look like at the end of my first year blogging:

  • My Moz DA = 29
  • My Tots100 ranking = 1,752
  • Facebook page likes = 166
  • Twitter followers =1,221
  • Instagram followers = 383
  • YouTube subscribers = 76
  • Pinterest followers = 161

These stats are pretty poor really in comparison to other blogs that started out around the same time as me, but I know the why behind my stats (apart from one). If you have been slogging and slogging and not really seeing an increase in your stats then it might be worth asking where to concentrate your time. There’s loads of helpful blog posts out there about this kind of thing.

Moz DA is the internet domain authority, basically how good your site and posts are at showing up in searches. Mine is 29, some of the bigger bloggers I know are at around 40 and some very visible bloggers I see a lot in the groups who are regularly posting content are a bit lower in the early 20’s so I think 29 is OK. You might often see people advertising their DA when offering to give a backlink on their site to your site for a guest post.

My Tots100 ranking is dire. This ranking would be representative of a blog which does not post very often or is very new. This is the stat that I’m slightly confused about. Tots100 is great website for bloggers go and check it out! The scoring system is explained on their website but basically they take a few numbers and try to calculate where your blog ranks among all the registered blogs. My low number could be because my Instagram following is low compared to a lot of bloggers (Instagram is a whole other kettle of fish!) and I’m not on Klout so that may or may not attribute to the low score.

 

Facebook is actually one of my more successful platforms. Even though 166 likes may be considered really low, my post reach is quite high in relation to page likes thanks to very supportive friends who like, share and comment on my posts. My posts are never gonna go viral on there but I’m thankful for a lot of support from my friends. Facebook have been a bit hit and miss for bloggers and small business owners of late in changing their charging structure. I personally do not pay to boost posts there yet but I don’t see why you wouldn’t  if you felt it would benefit your page. I get enough from the engagement with my blog on Facebook to feel the benefit.

Twitter. Oh how I love Twitter. It’s like the detention room at school, all the funny people are over on Twitter! I used to spend a lot of time there, probably more than any other social media channel because I see things like posts, news, and funny articles that I don’t find anywhere else. However, the mummy blogging network on Twitter is – I hate to say it – a bit of a bore! It is mostly, and understandably, used as a marketing tool with most mummy blogger accounts using post schedulers to make their hard-worked on posts visible. So I’m missing the witty quips and indulgent swearing I used to get from my old personal account where I followed a lot of American comedians.

Instagram as I said is a whole can of worms, with the algorithm changing so frequently (or so it seems) that none of us can keep up. People are really tapping into the power of Instagram so the landscape has changed a lot in the last few months even. There are Instagram bots and ‘like for like’ and people following and un-following left right and centre! I go on there because my ego can’t help but think people are actually interested to see pics of my little family and what we have been up to but also there are some *amazing* photographers on there if you know where to look ;). There are some really cute accounts too and I must confess to completely enjoying the element of voyeurism Instagram affords.

YouTube is fun and scatty and has a really youthful, new vibe to it. I post these vids and wonder why people would want to watch me on a video but they do! And I watch them too! I’m actually currently a bit addicted to the Daily Bumps YouTube channel who are an American vlogging family. YouTube is exciting because it feels like you could find anything you want on there. Someone advised that if you look at YouTube as a search engine rather than another social media platform you will likely have more success over there. P.S. if you like YouTube check out my friend’s channel MyahZineTV it’s fab! My friend Ceri and her husband and daughter do crafts, kids recipes and weekly fun vlogs.

Pinterest to be honest can be found languishing in the corner. I love it but I tend to forget it’s there and I use it for personal use more than for the blog. I know there is masses of untapped traffic through Pinterest and I see quite a few of the American mommy bloggers doing a lot with it so I think this might be one for me to work on.

Anyway that was quite a long post for some stats! But the long and short of it is, enjoy your blog, make it unique to you, ask yourself how you define success and go for it! Don’t be shy. Good Luck.